I remember the anxiety, the nerves, and the possibility she wasn’t going to like the gift I bought her. I was a very awkward middle school student who was basing his knowledge on late night Nickelodeon shows and assumed he had played this Valentine’s well. I bought my first girlfriend some cuddly doll; who wouldn’t want that? Then about three weeks later I was dumped quite unceremoniously on my birthday (She claims she didn’t know). The events are connected (probably). Since then I have looked at V-Day with cautious eyes.
So I admit to not knowing much to anything about the origins of Valentine’s Day, but boy, I wish I did so I could go back in time and stop it from becoming this important. I have always filed it under “Hallmark Holidays” in the sense that there is such a bombardment of commercialism associated with it that to ignore it would bring dire consequences. If you really love the people around you, hopefully you say and show it often and you don’t need the help of a crappy $2 card with Snoopy to show it (also, chocolate should be eaten year round).
But sadly I live here, too, and have gone through the motions over the years. Now I can only speak to my experience as a guy but I think my advice is practical for all. So as you prepare for Valentine’s Day have these thoughts in mind.
Do Your Homework. I am convinced there are two types of girls when it comes to this rosy day. You either love the majesty of it all or you find it as forced as I do. Do NOT assume which type your significant other is.
This reconnaissance work should be done in January, far from the actual day so it doesn’t look like you’re sloppy and forgot. Maybe there was a past traumatic experience or an ex who rolled out the red carpet (screw you dude who raised her expectations). The only way to plan properly is to know this and only then will you actually give her what she wants; the whole show or some extra affection on a Tuesday.
Roses Are For Idiots. They are overused, trite, and lame. Your significant probably thinks so too. Shoot I would even go as far to say that they actually have a specific flower they like. If you were a good companion, you would already know this and purchase accordingly. Nothing says, “I half-assed buying you something” like roses does.
Out vs. In. If you go out, it’s you and every other couple out there making the best of a Tuesday night. If you stay in and cook some dinner it’s considered making the memory and will be remembered longer than some fancy cocktail at a trendy Dupont restaurant. That said, I won’t be taking my own advice and going out, but it’s a great night to use a gift certificate for somewhere nice (thanks, Matt).
I will say it again. Valentine’s Day is all about knowing what works and not letting the hype get out of hand. And for the single people out there, don’t let Hallmark depress you with their huge display in CVS. St Patrick’s day is right around the corner and you can be sad that you aren’t Irish to celebrate that. This is a great time to eat lots of chocolate though…
Enjoy your Vday, Borderstanis.
What Grinds My Gears
- No matter how bad the Metro gets, there is no one held accountable or improvements? What gives?
Links! Links! Ice Cold Links!
- DC taxis are about to get worse.
- Forget Tebowing. Try Bradying.
- Unsure how to feel about new Spider-Man movie. Thoughts anyone?